Friday, July 18, 2008

Dear Loony Landlady

Dear Loony Landlady,

Thanks to you and your new friend(with benefits) Brent, for fixing the facia board over the patio. I appreciate the fact that he worked hard on it, and that he came over and cleaned up his mess.

Yeah, about that...when he was going to remove the debris, I had no idea that it would be up to me to drag it down to the curb for trash pick up. But, I didn't mind (too much), and the husband and I piled it all out there Wednesday night. Imagine my surprise when I found out that they didn't pick it up on Thursday morning. And yes, my bill is paid, so don't get snarky. I contacted the disposal company, and per the driver and then the customer service rep, they can't pick that stuff up on a regular trash run, as it's considered construction materials.

So, we have a few choices here. One, you can contact the trash company and arrange a special pick up for around $35. Or, you store the debris in your garage until heavy pick up day, which MIGHT be sometime next spring. Or, your friend (with benefits) Brent, can haul it off somewhere. Any of these is fine with me. What's not fine with me is it staying in my trash bins in my garage.

Look, I know you're busy. You work all day, and then you dress provocatively and drive that hot-rod model T of yours around on Friday nights. I don't know if that tube top and those short shorts were quite the look you were going for, but you certainly were working it. I understand perfectly; you've got a new man in your life and you want to look good for him. And I'm sure having to take care of the hassles that owning rental property can sometimes bring is getting in the way of you to having fun (sexy times). I think that it's great that a woman of your age (65) is active. I was quite surprised to see you and Brent out roller-blading last week. I didn't even know you could still get those spandex bike shorts! You go, girl! But before you go, could you please come and get this trash already?

Sincerely,
Your Tenant

3 comments:

Lurkergirl said...

Oh--the visuals...........

STACY'S TRIP said...

oh i love this

Beth from the Funny Farm said...

Well.. at least something got fixed!